I am scheduling this post literally an hour before we leave for another flight!
I can only hope I have learnt these lessons well enough to not repeat the same mistakes!
Wish me luck!!!
We are home!!!
We had a lovely time away but it is good to be back into the routine of our daily lives
(did I just say that?)
Travelling with two little ones by myself was as eventful as I had predicted,
but I did make some mental notes for next time.
1. Do not dress your children in white for travelling. EVER.
2. Do not give children in white, M&M's on the plane unless you are going for the rainbow clown look on arrival. Freddo frogs are just as bad, cheese and bacon balls, forget it.
3. M&M packets are hard to open whilst juggling an infant on your lap. Contrary to popular belief, air hostesses do not have permanent smiles on their face, especially whilst trying to dodge rolling M&M's with their food trolley.
4. Do not tell your child they can watch a movie on the plane until you definitely know that
a) they have movies on the plane
b)the movies will not be M rated
c) you have the ability to juggle an infant, whilst trying to get your credit card out of your purse and swipe it through a ridiculously small slot without elbowing your other child in the face.
5. Do not let your infant fall asleep on your lap with their head towards the aisle. You will either risk them being hit by that ridiculously large food trolley, a man posing as a giant as he goes to the toilet or attempting to move them closer towards you, without waking them up whilst trying to open the packet of M&M's....impossible. Face them the other way and risk being hit in the head with the arm rest as the other child continually raises it to try and put the head phone socket in. If your infant can not sleep sitting up, with their massive metal seatbelt clasp in their back and the tray table centimetres from their face,
perhaps don't expect them to sleep at all.
6. An adult and two children can not fit into an airplane toilet cubicle AND go to the toilet. If you are willing to attempt it...
place the infant in the wash basin, sitting up.
Hold them with one hand.
Lean against the door. HOLD the child going to the toilet with your legs.
Use your spare hand to hold the child's shirt so it is not peed on.
Be sure to lock the door before you scar the immaculately dressed air hostess for life.
If it is you who needs go to the toilet,
forget it or invest in nappies for all three of you.
But we survived, we are home,
with a few orange stained shirts and extra bruises but none the less, we made it!
I am grateful that for the first 22 years of my life I rarely wore jeans.
Grateful that my mother refused to dress her child in jeans that would have looked like these....
Hey it was the 80's
Nothing like a bit of fluorescent colour to brighten your day.
By the time I was old enough to select my own clothes
these were my style icons...
Oh Beverley Hills how I miss thee, but oh so grateful I missed this jean trend.
I was a late bloomer with the jeans movement and it literally took me going to a "Levi" conference to change my mind. I was working in retail when a levi rep came to give us a presentation about Levi's their history, current trends and which style best suited our shapes. For me it was bootcut. But did I listen...NO!
These skin Tight lee jeans were calling my name and I listened and followed.
Problem was I thought my body looked like the one above aswell.
Hey it was uni days I was starving and drinking cask wine.
I probably looked more like this as I hit the dance floor.
Then came the Maternity Years.
No the dancing didn't lead to the pregnant state and
yes we have fast forwadred through a few years where I went out into the big wide work world, got married and was sensible enough to not attempt to wear jeans.
These maternity jeans with their ugly massive waist band were actually...soooo comfortable!
I lived in them! I am courageous enough to say I still wear them!!!
enter Mum Jeans.
Ok so I'll say what we are all thinking.
They do look comfortable?
They are so high waisted no chance of muffin top here!
Mum Jeans are all about that neck hugging waist line.
Hey if Katie Holmes wear them they must be good?
So thats wear I'm at.
Somewhere between Maternity and Mum jeans.
Hoping to avoid muffin top or bedazzled jeans, grateful for all the jeans in my life